Your Ted Cruz and Carly Fiorina Veepstakes Anagram of the Day

During the 2012 election, this blog ran a number of Veepstakes anagrams tying Mitt Romney to various potential running mates (Christie, Pawlenty, Santorum, and others) until he picked Paul Ryan and we ended up with "Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan = My Ultimate Ayn Rand Porn."

This year we have the strange situation of an obvious GOP loser picking another obvious GOP loser as his running mate long before the GOP convention has a chance to declare them the official losers, so here's our one chance to honor Ted and Carly with an Veepstakes anagram of their own.

Congratulations. May your Crazy Rancid Life Tour run forever.

A Bonus Paul Ryan Anagram

We knew about Paul Ryan's youthful love for the literary apostle of selfishness, and recently learned about his love for Rage Against the Machine, but who knew that he had once fused these two passions into a short songwriting spurt of his own, masterfully using the letters of his own full name to compose an ode to his beloved Alisa Zinov'yevna Rosenbaum, alias "Ayn Rand":

Paul Davis Ryan = Sad "I Luv Ayn" Rap

Unfortunately, the only known recordings of Ryan's Opus One have been squirreled away in an undisclosed location with Mitt Romney's missing tax returns from 1999-2009, but the title remains a tantalizing clue to the development of this multi-dimensional renaissance man running for Vice President of the United States.

The Romney Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

In speaking of Mitt Romney's endless search for the most boring of potential running mates, it seems that we aren't hearing nearly enough about the sleep aid popularly known as "Mitch Daniels".

Romney and Daniels = Darn Anodyne Slime

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Check out the earlier installments in the Romney Running-Mate Anagram series by clicking on any of these names:
Santorum, Ayotte, Pawlenty, Christie, Cheney, Portman, Ryan, Jindal ... 

The Romney Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

Some of these anagrams -- like "Romney and Christie" equaling "Riches and Enormity" -- come so easily that they're like found objects, but  the combination of Jindal with Romney produced no such immediate unmediated gems, at least in my mind.  However, the name of the current Governor of Louisiana is mentioned so often, along with the terrifically soporific names of Portman and Pawlenty, that I needed to come up with something for this recurring anagram feature on TrueBlueLiberal.org.

So here it is. Reflecting the fact that Bobby Jindal might provide a small and temporary boost and distraction for Mitt Romney's embattled campaign, this is all I've got:

"Mitt Romney and Bobby Jindal" = "A Tiny Blind Joy Bombardment"

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Check out the earlier installments in the Romney Running-Mate Anagram series by clicking on any of these names:
Santorum, Ayotte, Pawlenty, Christie, Cheney, Portman, Ryan. 

The "Ultimate" Romney Running-Mate Anagram

Don't be scared by the title into thinking that the anagram well is running dry. As long as potential running mates keep turning down Mitt Romney in the 2012 GOP Veepstakes, I'll try to come up with these anagrams that get to the heart of the candidate seeking to follow Mitt into the loser's circle on the night of November 6th.

Today's victim is Paul Ryan, noted Ayn Rand devotee who, in true mittromneyan manner, claims to have flip flopped in his love for the brutal apostle of selfishness. The unassailable beauty of the anagram shows that his love for Ms Rand is never-ending:

Therefore, Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan = My Ultimate Ayn Rand Porn

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Previous running-mate anagrams can be found by clicking on these names: Santorum, Ayotte, Pawlenty, Christie, Cheney, and Portman. 

The Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

In a move to deflect today's news about Mitt Romney's Bain tenure, the questions raised by his missing tax returns, and his disastrous appearance before the NAACP yesterday, his campaign is floating stories about a  "surprising" Vice-Presidential choice.  The name that's popping up in right-wing blogs is Condoleezza Rice, but when push comes to shove it's hard to imagine Romney -- with his own iffy social conservative bonafides -- choosing someone who is even more liberal than he is on issues like abortion, gay rights, and immigration.

I'd like to suggest an even more surprising name in the 2012 GOP Veepstakes, a man with impeccably right-wing credentials, experience in foreign policy, and service under multiple Republican Presidents.  Mitt Romney is having dinner with this man in Wyoming tonight (no photographers allowed please).  Richard "Dick" Cheney has a new heart, he's ready to serve, and Vice Presidents are not limited to a mere two terms in office.  Plus, Dick probably knows what secrets lurk in Mitt's missing tax returns and where other bodies are buried (not that we're suggesting that blackmail will play any role in Mitt's final decision about his running mate). Surprise! This will turn the 24-hour news cycle away from Bain Capital questions.

Therefore: "Romney and Cheney" = "Deny No Archenemy"

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Previous running-mate anagrams can be found by clicking on the names: Santorum, Ayotte, Pawlenty, Christie, and Portman. 

The Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

If Mitt Romney decides that he needs to placate the true-believing nutjob base that has been uninspired by his Olympic-caliber Flipping and Flopping, he may be tempted to reach out to their patron saint: Rick Santorum.

If this dream team ever were to make it to the White House, we could probably (among other atrocities) say goodbye to  support for NPR, PBS, the National Endowments for the Arts and Humanities, and anything else that smacked of secular American culture.

Therefore, "Romney Santorum" = "Mourn Arts Money"

Romney has already said that Sesame Street should support itself with advertising. He'd have no trouble cutting other arts funding, even without VP Santorum pushing him harder in that direction.


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Catch up with earlier running-mate anagrams here: Ayotte, Pawlenty, Christie, and Portman. 

A Bonus Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

Mitt Romney's July 4th march through Wolfeboro with New Hampshire Senator Kelly Ayotte yesterday led many scribes in the stenography pool of our major media outlets to refer to the freshman Senator from the Granite State as another on the lengthening short list of Republican Vice Presidential candidates.

The ineluctable intelligence of the anagram shows that this may be a poor choice. Pairing neighbors from New Hampshire & Massachusetts (& Michigan & Utah & California & New Hampshire & Cayman Islands & Switzerland & ...) may not be the best strategy for fundraising in the GOP's deep-South and Western homes.

The day the Romney and Ayotte ticket is announced could turn out to be A Rotten Money Day.

Click on the names to catch up with previous running-mate anagrams for Pawlenty, Christie, and Portman.

Running-Mate Anagrams of the Day

There seems to be a growing consensus among the consensus-makers of our airwaves, newsprint, and cables that  Mitt Romney will need to pick someone even more anodyne, colorless, and boring than the MittBot2012 himself as his running mate. Rising to the top of this list is Senator Robert Jones "Rob" Portman, who was the Director of George W. Bush's Office of Management and Budget (please don't fall asleep yet).

I liked the Pynchonian overtones of this anagram:

Random Entropy indeed, man. You can just feel the energy being sucked out of our political theater. There's just something very right about this to me, but then I'm someone who's read Gravity's Rainbow four times, and some people might find something wrong about that.

I also happened upon the least relevant anagram for this particular duo:

Obviously ridiculous. Not even the most dangerously hooked political addict (or pornography fiend with a bland-white-person fetish), would find this combination of automatons even vaguely titillating, even momentarily.

If the animations up above aren't working,
the first reads: "Romney and Portman" = "Random Entropy, Man"
the second reads "Romney Portman" = "Momentary Porn"

Running Mate Anagram of the Day

Chris Christie is on ABC's Nightline as I write this.  He's still thinking that he may be on Mitt Romney's potential Veep list, so we'll humor him by making him the anagram of the day.

If the animation up above isn't working, "Romney and Christie" = "Riches and Enormity".

(And if you missed it, here's another running-mate anagram)

It may be cruel, but it's not unusual in the USA.

The real news out of the Supreme Court today is not that the Justices decided children shouldn't be sentenced to die in prison, but that four members of the court -- John Roberts, Sam Alito, Tony Scalia, and Clarence "The Silent" Thomas -- voted to uphold the right of states to impose life in prison without chance of parole for children 14 and under.

"Determining the appropriate sentence for a teenager convicted of murder presents grave and challenging questions of morality and social policy... Our role, however, is to apply the law, not to answer such questions. The pertinent law here is the Eighth Amendment to the Constitution, which prohibits 'cruel and unusual punishments.' Today, the court [majority] invokes that amendment to ban a punishment that the court does not itself characterize as unusual, and that could not plausibly be described as such."            -- John Roberts

Read more: http://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2012/06/25/Court-No-life-without-parole-for-teens/UPI-69051340639955/#ixzz1ypXQTTpS

He didn't say that life in prison without the chance of parole for a 12-year-old wasn't cruel. Therefore a punishment that is both Cruel AND Usual -- ie, enforced by 29 of our most backward states -- is not unconstitutional in the minds of the four dissenters.  This sort of judicial logic would have upheld slavery.

A liberal watching SCOTUS, even on days when the decisions go the right way by a thin margin, has to be a masochist akin to those on the left who watch Fox or listen to Rush, hence today's anagram: Roberts, Scalia, Alito, Thomas = To Roast a Liberal Masochist. 

Romney Running-Mate Anagram of the Day

Looking for anagrammatic advice in their quest to add meaningful diversity to this fall's Republican ticket, the GOP braintrust likes the way that ROMNEY PAWLENTY highlights the fact that the ticket is PARTLY NEW MONEY, with Tim P being the son of a milkman who worked his way through college rather than the son of Governor and auto company president who feels that becoming President of the United States is his birthright.

Seamus Romney

Seamus Romney gives us the anagrams of the day related to defecating in terror when riding on the roof of the family station wagon for 12 hours:

Seamus Romney = Name Your Mess

... or more appropriately, as Seamus's name becomes a rallying cry for animal lovers everywhere in this election year:

Seamus Romney = My Name Rouses

Malleable Mitt's Secret Identity

The anagram of the night follows the theme of the day, reassuring my fellow liberals that Willard "Mitt" Romney, aka Malleable Mitt, really is one of us, just waiting to show his true Massachusetts Liberal roots and continue the institutionalization of Obamneycare and implementing the entire progressive agenda if he happens to find himself forced into the White House by those voters  who might find themselves incapable of reelecting an African-American President.

Click on the box to animate the anagram of the night*



 Please don't tell the Republicans of Alabama and Mississippi who might be voting for Mitt in their primaries tomorrow. They know he's a tool, but they just don't know whose tool. Yet.

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*If the animated GIF up above doesn't work, "Massachusetts Liberal" = "Mitt Has Reusable Class".

The Secret Anagrammatic Message of Mitt Romney's Super Pac

If Mitt Romney's Super Pac "Restore Our Future" is spending 95% of its rich donors' cash on negative advertisements now in the primary against Gingrich and Santorum, we won't be able to expect a single positive message from R.O.F. if Romney faces President Obama as the GOP nominee later in 2012.

Click on the Box to Animate the Super Tuesday Anagram

All we can do is to hope that they will wear out their welcome long before the November and that every voter and television viewer will refer to them by (and follow the message of) their secret anagrammatic name: Refuse Our Torture.

I promise this will be the last anagram for the day...

... but my promises aren't worth the pixels flashing across your screen.

Click on the Box to Reveal the Troll's Name.

The same person who can use the letters of his/her own name to reveal an inner trollishness, can also use those same letters to comment on the current status of the GOP Presidential Sweepstakes: "Trail my idol, Mr. Newt."

Sorry John, but I woke up anagramming ...

... and the anagrams of the morning are for SPEAKER BOEHNER -- HE, BARKEEPER SON (or HE'S NO BARKEEPER).

Please Click on the Box to Bring It to Life!

Share these with him if you know @SpeakerBoehner.  I'm sure they will make him cry like a baby.

Anagrams are addictive (and sometimes weirdly appropriate)

Is WILLARD ROMNEY more appropriately anagrammed as WEIRDLY NORMAL or as NORMALLY WEIRD?

Liberal War On Christmas Anagrams of the Day

Newt Gingrich = Grinch Twinge = Grinch Get Win!
Callista Gingrich = 'Tis Glacial Grinch

Inspired by this: