What secret liberals from Massachusetts wear south of the Mason-Dixon line. |
Much has been written about Willard "Mitt" Romney's secret Mormon underwear and its magical properties, but we were finally able to break the news about what he was really wearing on the night of his Florida victory over his non-liberal opponents. Now our secret liberal double agent within the GOP is doubling down on his good luck charms going into tomorrow's contests far south of the Mason-Dixon line, wearing his True Blue Mississippi Liberal underwear over his heart and his True Blue Alabama Liberal boxers below his non-Gingrichian waistline.
We can be assured that the power of these garments will ensure that we will have a choice of TWO liberal major-party presidential candidates in early November, despite the pollsters who are still holding out a candle of hope for conservatives Newt'n'Rick in tomorrow's electoral contests for the hearts and votes of Dixie's Republicans.
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